DC This and DC That

Ok, so for the past few weeks I've been "living" in DC. I needed a little change from my New York City routine. But enough with the minuscule details. On to more important trials and tribulations. As everyone knows, New York celebrities are rich, pretty people, and DC celebrities are smart, ugly people. I have nothing against the Washington Post, I mean its no New York Times, but come on, what newspaper is? After the sports I dive into the style's reliable source section. For those New Yorker's out there, its the "equivalent" to the Post's Page Six. But unlike Page Six which is brainless, fun entertainment, the reliable source sucks. I literally haven't heard of any of the people and the sightings are awful! I think one yesterday was noting Elena Kagan (who???) shopping for celery. Wow, hold the presses!!! But I knew DC was like this already, and I'm dealing with it the best I can.

Because I'm such a good son, I've also been driving Sue to work at the butt crack of morning (re: 8am) to help her out. I can do that Mass Ave. drive with my eyes closed now. Well, this morning I am driving back up Mass Ave., drooling at the thought of crawling back into bed, and I see cops run out the back of the Vice President's mansion and onto the street halting traffic in both directions. At first I think something bad is going down, and I duck my head (DC is embarrassingly known for snipers) but then I see the gates open and a little blonde gal is jogging down the pathway. Yes, Jill "Bimbo" Biden needs to go out for her morning run; making hundreds of commuters late for work. Isn't this kind of selfish of her? I guess it's the law to have security detail, but don't freaking run during rush hour! DC is known for awful rush hours. Maybe I need to start listening to these Republican debates because if Jill keeps this up, my vote might sway OR Sue is going to have to start taking the bus!