Me Don't Like Lines

One of the great things about retired life is being able to avoid crowds. Was at Social Eatz the Friday night after it won best burger award from Time Out New York and the hostess said one hour wait. Even I couldn't talk my way outta this one but no worries I thought, I'll just got back Monday afternoon and have the place to myself, which I did and loved. But the one place where you can't avoid the lines is at the Big Apple BBQ Bash.

This annual BBQ bash, located in Madison Square Park, features kiosk-type stands from Pit Masters and chefs from the best BBQ places in the nation. The premise is a good one, but the outcome is awful. No one from New York actually goes to this thing. It sounds fun and people talk about it, but when that second weekend in June comes along, no one in their right mind actually goes. I'll make a confession and say I did go a few years back and it wasn't a pleasant experience. The last thing you want to do in mid-June in New York City is stand in the sweltering heat waiting for hot, heavy bbq food. Let's just say Josh found that out the hard way. I pretty much needed to put an IV of Gatorade into his arm.

The thing that really gets me heated is the lines for the local restaurants at the bash. Why the hell would you wait in line for two hours for ribs at Blue Smoke (also, is Blue Smoke even around anymore?), when you can literally walk over to the restaurant and eat immediately. (Side note-Again, why would you wait in line at Shake Shack in Madison Square Park, when you can take the subway to the Upper West Side, order, and then take the subway back down in faster time? Makes no sense. This is the stuff that bothers me.) I can understand wanting the pulled pork from the obscure BBQ shack from Decatur, Alabama. But for the three hours you'll wait in line, you might as well fly down there!

There are just some things you don't do in New York. Going to the BBQ Bash is like doing the Five Borough Bike Ride or going out to the Lower East Side on a Saturday night.  You just don't do it! I guess you can say these are some of my rules of living in New York. "Hey, I'm Retired at 28!"